My pajamas and sheets are milk-stained – whenever one breast feeds, the other lets down some milk in solidarity.

Earlier this week I went through what I think was a bout of mastitis, with fever and chills and generally feeling miserable. My MFM’s nurse, who’s also a lactation consultant, sent in a prescription for antibiotics but encouraged me to try and get the ducts unclogged manually. Heat didn’t seem to help, but ice packs did. It had been the same when my milk came in after we lost A&C, though I only remembered after the fact. And while I was physically much more uncomfortable this time, I can assure you that it’s much better with a baby to drink the milk. (Not that you’d have any doubts.) We just spent the whole morning in bed, snuggling and sleeping.

Yesterday I hit the point where I’m starting to realize why people don’t get anything done with a newborn in the house. SB seems to be sleeping less already (do they really grow up this fast?) so while I had grand plans of writing up the birth story and making myself something nice for dinner, I held and nursed my baby, cleaned up poop from more fabrics than I care to remember, ran laundry and ate granola. And cried a little about not having gotten to experience any of this with A&C, about how much I love this little girl, and with generally being overwhelmed. (This tends to happen 1-2x per day. It lasts a few minutes and then I’m better again.) So, while wonderful, it’s not exactly easy. But still wonderful.


7 thoughts on “MilkyLeaks

  1. Thinking of you. Just remember that on top of obvious emotional triggers, 10 months of hormones are leaving your body so the emotions will be out if control. I found the first month poignant but of so hard. Hugs.

  2. I have crying fits too. Not so much sad, just so so emotional. And I can see it would be even more so for you. It’s OK to let it out (but as everyone has told us a dozen times, if constant crying lasts longer than a couple of weeks, talk to a dr. about PPD!) Chores, meh, they can always wait for later LOL!

  3. Thanks for writing about your experience. I love it that new moms don’t paint a rosy picture of motherhood. But also thanks for letting us know that it’s not easy but still wonderful. I hope that Strawberry baby will sleep more for you and you’ll get time to rest.

  4. While babies are wonderful, they are wonderful, sweet, adorable, frustrating bundles of need, no? A little awful AND a lot wonderful at the same time, I sometimes find.

    (You did LAUNDRY! Congratulations! You did something that was not feeding or cleaning a baby!)

  5. Just came here hoping for some news that would make my day. And I found it. I can’t tell you how happy I am for you. That’s one gorgeous baby you have there! Congratulations, mama. And yes, there will be many moments and days that try you, but I promise you, for as many of those as you might have ahead you have many more moments of joy and love to look forward to. So hang in there through the sleepless haze. Wishing you, your husband and your beautiful little bundle all the love and laughter you all so deserve.

  6. They really do grow up so fast! Amazing how quickly our babies change, right before our eyes. Hope you’ve been able to get your leaky boobs :) under control. I joke, but it really is a difficult time, even though we love it at the same time! No wonder it’s so emotional. It’s the hardest, yet most rewarding thing in the world, this motherhood business.

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