still standing

After almost 2 months of doing different stuff, I’m back. Still not pregnant. The good news is a job lined up for next year that I’m totally excited about — I’d love to start much earlier than I probably will. Like, tomorrow. Maybe a change of scenery would help us in another sense, too.

Before the summer, I thought that, while we may be trying without much (ok, any) success, at least I wasn’t surrounded by bellies popping up here and there. Well, that changed, without warning — at least 5 of my friends are either pregnant or have just given birth. In fact, I heard about a new baby in the family today where I hadn’t even known they were pregnant. Sigh. That did hit me rather unexpectedly this morning. (I don’t like crying at my desk. Good thing nobody seemed to pay too much attention that moment.)

Last Sunday, I woke up at 7am (which never happens), lay wide awake and wondered whether getting pregnant right now would be a good idea (see job above). But now, sad again over everyone else succeeding so seemingly easily*, I would be so happy about a 2nd line. Somehow I just don’t see it coming though. Ideally of course I’d love to start my job, get settled, get some work done, and get pregnant then. But as you all know from unfortunate experience, we cannot exactly schedule this…

Thanks for all your comments on the HSG vs. lap question — since I was travelling most of the time I haven’t had any appointments yet, but I lean towards the lap at the moment, in part because I’ve had some odd pain during my period which I very much hope is not endo, but I’d rather have someone check.

I’ll try to catch up with your blogs in the next days — hoping I’ve missed many BFPs!

* Not all of them: one of my friends told me that it had taken her “a long time”, which gave me some hope — she knew we’ve been trying. I don’t know how long long is though.

8 thoughts on “still standing

  1. Congratulations on your new job!!! I know all about the job rut these days, and am glad you are getting out of yours. As for ttc, I hope you come to a decision that you can live with about how aggressive you want to be about it (ART and all that). Good luck weighing the pros and cons. I like to live by the phrase that ‘there is no good time to get pregnant’. So there is no point in putting it off, really. But that’s a personal opinion, and I do still regret the loss of that Oxford position… but oh well, I’d totally way rather be a mom. I suppose it could have been arranged to have both (by postponing pregnancy), but my heart wasn’t in that decision (plus, I didn’t find out I got the job until after I was pregnant, so maybe it wasn’t all that in my control).

  2. It’s good to see you back and that’s great news about the job! Makes a huge difference to peace of mind when things in at least one area of life go well. As far as the pregnant friends/relatives, I’m convinced: these things come in waves. And, sometimes, droves:)

  3. Congratulations on the new job! I just had my final interview yesterday for a new job, and I feel the same way as you: there’s nothing like a change of scenery to do some good. Good luck, and I can’t wait to hear more about it.

  4. Welcome back!!. Congrats on the new job. I know what you mean about wondering if this is the right time to get pregnant, but I always come back to the same answer… if these things were so easy to plan then we’d all be pregnant by now. I wish so badly that we could all choose a convenient and perfect time to become (and stay) pregnant, that would be a wonderful world to live in wouldnt it?

  5. Congrats on the new job! I say get pregnant now, today, tomorrow, whenever! As someone told me (before we entered IF), a job is a job but your family is forever. Good luck with everything!

  6. Congratulations on the new job! I have to echo other comments – I’ve stopped planning my potential pregnancy around my life. I don’t care when it happens – I just want it to happen. If it were something that were easy to just do when I wanted to, maybe it would be different…

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